Polk County GOP Chairman Delivers Dr. Seuss-Style Poem on Data Centers at Lakeland City Commission Hearing
Polk County Republican Party Chairman Sam Romain, 31, took an unconventional approach to public comment at the Lakeland City Commission’s July 20 hearing on a temporary moratorium that would pause acceptance, processing, review, and approval of applications for development permits on large scale projects such as Project Swan, the proposed data center in Lakeland.
Inspired by a bedtime reading of Dr. Seuss’s “The Lorax” with his children the night before, Romain stepped to the podium and delivered an original poem imagining the perspective of a hypothetical data center pitching itself to city leaders.

The poem, which drew smiles and a round of applause from the crowd, made a humorous yet pointed statement about the tactics used by large-scale developers who seek fast approvals and leave residents to absorb the high cost of infrastructure upgrades, water and energy consumption, excessive noise, and light pollution.
“Bad deals hate daylight, good cities stand tall,” Romain concluded.
You can read Romain’s full poem at the end of this article.
It was a rare moment of cross-partisan unity at a hearing that commissioners themselves noted had drawn concern from across the political spectrum. Both Romain and Spike Poma, steering committee chair for the Polk County Democratic Socialists of America, addressed the commission. Several residents, including members of Defund Oligarchy Blessed by Liberty, a local grassroots group also participated in the public hearing addressing the moratorium.
During the closing comments at adjournment, Mayor Sara Roberts McCarley commented on how helpful it was to hold a respectful and robust discussion in front of the the public, as more citizens are engaging in their civic responsibilities and right to be heard by elected officials. She thanked Stephanie Madden for encouraging Lakeland Electric staff and City Water staff to attend, bringing all the pieces together at the table.
Assistant General Manager for Energy Delivery at Lakeland Electric, Scott Bishop, encouraged the moratorium after answering several key questions raised by commissioners, including confirming that while Lakeland has 3 data centers, Publix uses the highest amount of Lakeland Electric power at 18 megawatts, a far cry from the 100 megawatts of power request by Ryan Corporation in their application for a large scale data center known as Project Swan. The temporary moratorium would cap large scale projects requesting 50 megawatts or more.
The commission is considering a proposed ordinance that would establish a 12-month moratorium on the acceptance, processing, review, and approval of applications for development permits related to data centers and large load customers drawing more than 50 megawatts monthly. The first reading was held July 6. A second reading and vote are expected in August.
Romain’s poem, read in full at the July 20 hearing, is below:

If I Was a Data Center
by Sam Romain
If I was a data center, a shiny dream,
I’d waltz to the city hall with a briefcase of schemes.
I’d tip my fine hat, and I’d flash you a grin,
Just sign it by lunchtime, and let the fun begin.
Don’t study, don’t question. Don’t look under the hood.
The less that you ask me, the quicker it’s good.
If I was a data center, I’d polish the pitch.
It’s green, it’s clean, it’s a community switch.
I’d talk about jobs with a soft little sigh,
And then fill up with servers and wave the town goodbye.
If I was a data center, I’d love a blank check
With a ratepayers footing, whatever comes next.
I’d sip on your water like juice from a sink,
Cooling all my servers, and tell you, don’t think.
I’d hug all the power, like a city-sized load,
New lines and substations all over the road.
I’d take all the megawatts, you take the bill,
I smile for the cameras and sit very still.
If I was a data center, I’d hum through the night
With fans and chillers and floodlights too bright.
The neighbors would hear it, the skyline would glare,
I’d call it progress and leave them the air.
I’d talk up the tax base and wait for a break,
Just one little incentive for goodness sake.
No taxes, no trouble, no cost on my side,
The city gets the glory, the families get fried.
If I was a data center, I’d slap an NDA on it,
So no one can say who’s moving this way.
Is it Meta? Is it Google? Some giant next door?
That’s a secret, I’d whisper. Don’t ask anymore.
No name on the record, no face in the light.
Just trust us, dear city. We’ll make it all right.
I take all the upside, the contracts, the clout,
And leave you the power bills, the noise and the doubt.
If I was a data center, I’d fear just one thing.
A city that asks, who pays for this bling.
Who pays for the water, who pays for the watts,
Who hides behind NDAs while locking the lot?
Who pays for the floodlights, the hum and the heat?
Who pays when the aquifer takes a defeat?
If I was a data center, I’d hate just one plan.
A city that pauses and looks at the land.
A pause isn’t drama, a pause isn’t hate,
A pause is a city that won’t take the bait.
If I was a data center, I’d beg you, move fast,
Approve it by lunch, and let the questions come last,
But I am glad that I’m not a data center.
I’m glad that you all stall.
Bad deals hate daylight, good cities stand tall.
Disclaimer: The Citrus Tea News is not here to tell you how to vote. We bring you the information so you can make your own informed decisions.

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Sources: Sam Romain, Polk County Republican Party Chairman, public comment, Lakeland City Commission hearing, July 20, 2026; Scott Bishop, Assistant General Manager for Energy Delivery, Lakeland Electric, public testimony, Lakeland City Commission hearing, July 20, 2026; Mayor Sara Roberts McCarley, closing remarks, Lakeland City Commission hearing, July 20, 2026; Proposed Ordinance 26-018, City of Lakeland, Florida, July 20, 2026.

